I find it fascinating that so often when I’m talking with senior leaders they talk about wanting to win the hearts and minds of their people and engage the talent they know they have in the workforce. But very frequently the ways in which organisations work seem almost designed to work against this.
Telling people what to do does not cause them to become more proactive, more self-reliant and nor does it give them an understanding of what they’ve got within them. This is where I find myself quite often talking about the value of a different kind of approach. If you wanted to give it a label I would call it ‘The Coach Approach’. Why the coach approach? Because coaching has fundamentally an assumption which is that people have skills and talents that need to be drawn out. The way you draw them out is not by trying to shove things down people’s throats. You get the best from people when they are able to access it themselves. This is a process of internal exploration and then action.
Here’s an example – I have just come back from working with a whole bunch of people who are very talented leaders in all sorts of different specialisms. The reason I was speaking at their conference is that they wanted to be better able to have the sorts of conversations which they know make a difference to clients and also illuminate what it is that clients really want. This is how they wanted to add value as they knew there was something that they weren’t doing.
In the course of our time together I was looking at one of the critical skills that indeed comprise the coach approach which is knowing how to ask good questions. The art of good questioning involves timing because you can ask the same question at different moments and get wildly different responses. It also involves understanding what you don’t know and are therefore engaged in an act of genuine enquiry. You are provoking thought. Whenever you ask a question what you do is you send a person on an internal search in terms of the neuroscience of it all.
There is an interesting aspect even in the word ‘question’. Look at what else is contained in that one word. Very often I will say to people the really important question is ‘what is the quest in your question’? Where are you directing attention? What is the journey you are sending people on when you ask them a question. When you do so that is exactly what you do, you send them on an internal search.
This is just one of a whole bunch of coaching skills which seem to me to be far too important to be left exclusively in the hands of people who are called Professional Coaches. This is why I have spent a lot of time making these skills available in a learnable format to people who frankly have very little interest in being coaches but who really do want to know how to adopt a coach approach – which means stop telling, start listening. Start a different kind of working relationship with people. That relationship will be characterised – not by a loss of authority on the contrary you can have your own clear position but the way you engage with people will enable them to do more than they have done before. It is almost like designing an alliance where the two of you, three of you or even a team begin to have a way of engaging in what is naturally there as latent talent. It seems to me that this is a skill pretty much anyone would benefit from knowing how to utilise.
I have taught this to people all over the world and they come from very different backgrounds but have one thing in common – they want to draw on the talent they know is there.
This is why I would say that coaching skills is something that pretty much anybody would benefit from learning about and becoming proficient in. They are skills and skills require practice.
You can read a book but you can’t get it from a book. That’s why we have a coaching programme and funnily enough, most of the people who come on the coaching programme are interested in applying it across the board in their life as a whole.
So if that interests you see you soon.
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Showing posts with label Coaching. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Coaching. Show all posts
Tuesday, 20 August 2013
Thursday, 16 May 2013
On Leadership & Overwhelm
One of the most important things I do is working with people
who are in leadership roles in very different organisations all over the world.
As part of that I find I am frequently asked to engage in coaching the next
generation of leaders in how to be effective as leaders.
A hallmark of leadership is you have responsibility but you also
frequently feel there are many things you need to attend to. So, it is often
the case that leadership and the experience potentially of overwhelm go
together.
How do you address overwhelm as a leader? This becomes a
question which any effective leader has to have an answer to. One of the things
that’s fascinating to me about being overwhelmed (or fearing that you’re going
to be overwhelmed) is that no one is ever really overwhelmed by what they are
doing. In fact they are overwhelmed by the number of things they are not doing
and that they feel they should be doing. You
therefore have this very curious thing that overwhelm is not about what you’re
doing but it is about what you feel should be doing.
The secret of dealing with overwhelm is getting very clear
about what matters most. If you don’t know how to prioritise it is going to be
really difficult to avoid feeling overwhelmed. If on the other hand you
cultivate the art of prioritising then overwhelm is not something you are going
to be on the receiving end of because you will always be addressing the
questions like... what is most important here? Where do I need to focus my
attention first? What is requiring my attention now?
You are therefore constructing timelines for yourself as
well as asking, ‘what is my top 10, my top 5, my top 3 things to do? Being able
to do this is a learnable skill but without practice it’s something which is
very difficult to do in the moment. Until you actually have some means of
stepping back you are unlikely to do that because you are way too busy being
busy.
One of the things I notice about people is that the longer
they are in the world of work, the busier they get. The busier you are the
greater the danger of you not being strategic because you are just doing your
best to keep up.
How to ensure that you don’t get lost in your own busyness
or you don’t get overwhelmed by the drama of the day? Well, you know what it is
like when you come back from holiday - you frequently see things differently.
Why? Because you’ve taken a break and stepped
back. You’ve created a breathing space.
I think very often that is what good coaching does and it is
absolutely why the CEOs I work with value having a coaching space. It is
because every so often, on a regular basis, they step back from the drama of
the day and they do something really important. They take a breath, they take
stock, they look at the big picture and then determine what really matters
here. Again they are prioritising, but they are doing so based on their own
values and there is an understanding of what is important going forward. They also
look at what is in keeping with their own primary values and the goals they
seek to realise. If you don’t do this on a regular basis you will forget what
your primary values are and what you are going for because you will just be
trying to keep up.
Good coaching creates the space to be strategic not just in
your leadership but in your leadership style.
This prevents overwhelm and that means you get to be a whole different kind of
leader – one who can inspire others to
learn how to do this too.
That has got to be a skill worth learning.
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Thursday, 21 February 2013
What Work Would You Like to be Doing if Money Didn’t Matter?
I think one of the most rewarding things I probably do is
working with people to clarify just what it is they want to be doing in life
and in which direction to be going in in order that they have a sense of
engaging in purposeful activity and indeed meaningful work. I think this is
particularly on my mind at the moment because in the last two weeks I have been
focusing on this area with different people of wildly different ages and yet
the same kind of questions arise. So, talking with a number of people who are
in their very early twenties who really have been grappling with ‘what is my
career path?’, ‘where am I heading’ and ‘what should I be doing?’. The kind of
schools career approach didn’t seem to be really very helpful for them
apparently and so I tend to go a different route which is to actually fall back
on a number of ways of asking questions that take us to the heart of the
matter.
To give you an example, many many moons ago, Alan Watts had
an interesting question that he would ask in a variety of different ways but
essentially it would all boil down to saying that if money was no object what
would you like to be doing? However you choose to come at that you’re really of
course saying let’s separate money and remuneration from the activity and let’s
be clear about what would be the optimal activities as far as you’re concerned
and what would you want to be doing?
This immediately takes us into questions about what is
satisfying to you, what is meaningful to you, what is energising for you and
what allows you to feel that what you’re doing is worth continuing to do and
could be the basis of a fulfilling life. Now obviously there are very good
reasons for wanting to get clear about this, not least if you spend about a
third of your life working it might be a smart idea to be doing something that
is rewarding. But of course people often think that rewarding must mean financially
and yes, you need to be able to eat, you need to be able to pay the mortgage or
whatever it may be but I think very often people jump straight to economic
necessities they perceive rather than getting clear about what I would really
get turned on by doing is this. Now, how could I do this and derive some kind
of worthwhile income from doing it. At the start of a professional life it is
an important question but you know it is just as important down the road,
thirties, forties and fifties.
I have worked with
people who have been in the bizarre position of spending years doing something
they really did not enjoy because they felt that they were restrained and they
had to because it was the only way they knew how to bring home the bacon. That
doesn’t really make a lot of sense to me just because you end up then living
your life doing something you don’t like in order that you can do more of it
tomorrow again. What? So really whatever one’s age these I think these
questions get to be really important.
And myself I know that, many moons ago, I became very clear
that the most rewarding things for me were being able to engage with people so
that they could create the kind of life that was meaningful to them. I just
found it incredibly rewarding, basically to be assisting people to become
really more of who they could be. I also found it very motivating , it got me
up in the morning and made me create a variety of businesses that are based on
that fundamental premise that it is possible to find what is meaningful to you,
it’s possible to move in that direction and you don’t have to give up the day
job necessarily but you gradually edge in the direction that makes sense to
you. For me that has been unbelievable satisfying, fulfilling, and frankly,
intensely moving so that I end up having people coming back. A couple of weeks
ago I had someone who said they would like to give me their book, and that
without me it would not have been written. There was also a little dedication
inside which was lovely.
So, I guess it doesn’t matter what age we are, the question
is if you separate the money from what you love to do, what would you love to
be doing and how might you begin to move in the direction of doing more of
that?
Creating your own legacy happens on a daily basis by having
the intention to move in the direction that is right for you.
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Wednesday, 6 February 2013
“It’s All Moving Forward Mate!”
The past ten days or so have been really extraordinarily fulfilling
because various projects have come to fruition in the way that I could only
have dreamt of until their realisation. The weekend before last we completed
the first of the new NLP Practitioner and Neuroscience programmes which has
just been a blast because it has been so fascinating putting the two together;
myself teaching the NLP and Professor Patricia Riddell, who is the professor of
Applied Neuroscience talking about the Neuroscience of what we’ve been doing. I’m
not too surprised but I am delighted at how people have been absolutely
fascinated by this overlap and the kind of rigour that Neuroscience now can
offer to an understanding of what it is that NLP can do and has been delivering
on.
So there has been that on the one hand and then this past
weekend we have just been seeing how it
is coming into its own in the domain of coaching
because we have just done three days together as a kind of double act on
Neuroscience and Coaching; the applied dimension of neuroscience and how having
an elementary understanding of some of what is going on in the brain can make a
huge difference to the way you think about, ‘well how do I function?’ and
indeed how do clients function? If you are planning on being a coach this is
clearly got lots of applications but frankly a lot of people in the room aren’t
planning on being coaches but they do want to know how to coach people in their
teams more effectively how to draw out the best in them, how you would use what
you could call a ‘coach approach’. The room was amazing, people were just
hungry for this knowledge and were enquiring for more about the brain and ways
in which they can practically apply their knowledge.
These last three days have just been so inspiring and not
just for me, I’m talking for Trish as well. Afterwards she was saying she had
been waiting thirty years to be able to do this, it is no good being in the lab
unless it can come out and having this practical application. Well, we can see
now that the dreams we both had when we started talking about how this could be
really are possible.
This morning my kind of Monday weekend I went out for a walk
and it was just gloriously sunny. It was the pleasure of just being out and
about with a feeling that things were moving in the right direction and that
really a vision I had had some years ago had finally started coming to fruition. As I am on my walk I notice that
there is a guy who is delivering a new empty skip to a house which is being
built nearby, but I notice what he’s got in his truck which is across the road
and is properly stabilised are two skips. One is empty and then that is containing
another skip that is full to the brim and what I see the machine doing is
raising up both, taking them over and dropping down both then he goes along
takes the chains off the bottom one and then puts the chains on the full one
and lifts that back onto his truck. I asked him if it was a new way of doing
things as I used to think you had to
bring the empty skip, put that down, pick up the old one, put it on the truck
and move the new one into place. The man told me that is exactly what you used
to have to do, he said it took “Bloody forever, Gov.”. He then said something
which I was thought was so, so brilliant, “You know, it’s the new technology,
it’s all moving forward mate”. And of course he was talking about his skip but
I thought how true and what a great summing of my experience.
So, I think I could say, along with man with the skip, it is
this new technology, it is all moving forward and it certainly is. I am looking
forward to it all moving forward. Certainly we’ve got plans for the next moves
and I’ll tell you about those but for now it is just great to be enjoying
simple ways of making good use of the brain that each of us has been endowed with.
So, it’s all moving forward, mate. Until the next time.
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Tuesday, 16 October 2012
The Colour of Birds
Well I tend to be an early riser, up about you know, six
usually, and this time of year, summer time, in Connecticut especially very
good reason for being up early. Because
I remember when looking for a home here coming across the description in the
realtors catalogue of this property that we finally bought, it said two
thousand three hundred feet of waterfront property. And by golly it is amazing! Because although most of it is absolutely
unusable, in that you know, it’s steep wooded forest going down to the lake, it
nevertheless provides a fabulous habitat for all sorts of animals. And when you’re out early in the morning, we
can go down to the lake, down to the dock, sit on the dock and actually if
we’re very quiet and stay there for a while, sometimes you’ll see deer come
down to drink form the lake, and it’s really quite magical. And sometimes the ducks come by as well and I
actually came across a book recently on bird watching. Now I’ve never really had much interest in
bird watching, I’m happy birds exist, I like to see them around, but that’s
about it. But I happened to open this
and I was flicking through it and there was something that was really striking
to me, it started to tell me about why birds are different colours, in terms of
how colouration is so important for their protection. Well obviously you know, you figure that
birds have to use camouflage as most animals do and indeed a bird’s survival
often depends on its ability to conceal itself, and especially of course
females sitting on their nests. So
there’s this thing called cryptic colouration or protective colouring, which
means the birds, if still, virtually disappear.
So here’s something that I think is kind of fascinating, when you see
birds with streaked or striped feathers, you can be pretty sure that they live
in grassy areas and that’s because the appearance is concealed, because the
field grasses blend in with the colouration.
On the other hand, birds that have green feathers are likely to be up
there in the tree tops and if they didn’t move around so much, you’d never see
them- the green matches the leaves. And
then there are the birds with dark backs and light bellies, like sparrows for
instance. And you can be pretty sure any
birds like that spend a lot of time on the ground, because the light underside
breaks up the overall shape of the bird, so it’s less noticeable, whereas an
all dark bird would be far more easily visible.
And of course you know the mottled grey or brown feathers of say an owl
that mean that birds just blend into the bark as long as they don’t move.
So, suddenly I had this set of distinctions about ahh we can
really understand different kinds of bird colouration here and what kind of
habitat they probably inhabit. And for
me anyway, this was like making sense of something which previously had been
you know, pretty random. And I often
think that when we can do that, when we can understand some working principles,
things become both easier to understand, but I think often more fascinating as
well, because it’s not just I don’t know, there you go, it just happens to be
pure chance- nothing very chancy about evolution in one sense, because it
really is about how you ensure your survival.
So I don’t know whether I’ll be going in for any cryptic
colouration myself, I don’t think that’s necessary. But just looking around the world and
understanding it differently, has enriched my morning experience as I sit on the dock and enjoy a cup of tea and look
up in the trees and see the birds.
So ‘til the next time.
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Monday, 10 September 2012
You, Your World and Your Brain
One of the things I’ve been doing a lot of in the past
couple of months is talking with my colleague, Professor Patricia Riddell about
the interrelation between neuroscience and change and indeed neuroscience and
coaching and neuroscience and NLP and a whole bunch of other things too. And the net result of this has been that we
have both found this very stimulating and so this is the beginning of something
which you will be seeing the fruits of certainly in the new year in the form of
a major programme that is gonna be neuroscience the real deal.
But right now one of the things that has really struck us
is how there are these simple things that have come out of the neuroscience
research that make an enormous difference on how people function and we just
wanted to get some of those out. So this
coming week for instance, on Thursday, we are going to be talking for an hour
and a half on some of these themes and we’ve been thinking about what would be
an interesting sort of area to explore, well we started very detailed and then
it became broader and then we ended up with You, Your World and Your Brain. That’s our working title so we seem to be
encompassing pretty much everything, not bad for 90 minutes.
But there is a lot of correlation here between the way
you use your brain, your sense of yourself and the world you create and it
shows up in some interesting ways, for instance, one of the things we wanna
touch on is how people are frequently much better at empathising with other
people than with themselves. Now you
might think that that’s kinda odd, you know, surely you can understand how it
is for you, well yes and no, actually the data is in, this is something which
is very clear from the neuroscience research, people empathise with others much
more effectively that they do with themselves.
Now that’s got a lot of implications if you wanna be effective for
instance, because you would need to learn how to empathise with yourself. And there are ways of doing that that have
been tried and tested and surprise, surprise we find that there is a large
overlap here with what we found works in NLP.
So there’s an example, that a very simple one but actually a rather
profound one of how the way you engage with yourself effects the world you live
in and understanding that your brain is not really wired for self-empathy means
you can do something about that and your life will be, not only will you feel
better, your life will be, I think, much better generally because you’ll be
more capable of understanding what’s going on in yourself.
So there’s a simple example and we are gonna actually
explore that practicalities what do you do in order to be able to have that
kind of empathy, how would you be able to best advise another how can you best
advise yourself. In the same way a lot
of people have very uneasy relationships with their own internal dialog, you
know I can think of many people I’ve worked with that have positively felt
persecuted by their internal dialog, but another way of understanding those
from a neuroscience point of view is that your inner voice is actually part of
how you are enabled to ensure effective communication between one part of your
brain and another. You know there’s
gotta be somebody who is introducing parties so to say and getting ideas
across. Now that is a completely
different function for internal dialog and again that’s a learnable skill, but
understanding why internal dialog would be really valuable again that’s kind of
useful and knowing how to do it even more so, the research is there we already
know this, so as Patricia and I talk about these things, it becomes very clear
that there are a lot of practical pay offs.
And then there are others, we will get to these in the evening, but for
instance have you ever had that experience where you recall something that
happened that wasn’t so great and you feel excruciating embarrassment when you
think about it and then you talk to someone else about it and they can barely
remember it even happening? Well there’s
something going on there, that’s how your brain works and there’s particular
attention to detail and we want to be able to show people how we can change
this and get a radically different understanding of what’s going on.
Anyway, all sorts of interesting things, I find it very
stimulating and hopefully you will to.
So till the next time.
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Friday, 10 August 2012
3 Labours of Love 12/03/2012
This past weekend, we were staying at a hotel, which is
clearly a labour of love for the people who own it. It is an Italian family, and they started
with a run-down building, and have turned it into a beautiful hotel. And they’re clearly proud of it, and it shows
when you arrive, there’s a letter waiting for you in every room and personally
addressed. And in the letter it says
‘These bedrooms and facilities have emerged from what at times has been long
and wishful thinking. It has taken over
fourteen years to transform what was once decrepit building into the lavish
surroundings that you can see here today.
It was often difficult to see the floor for the number of carpenters,
cabinet makers, electricians and decorators.
We have had many obstacles, and it has been an education beyond
comprehension.’ And I just thought this
was wonderful, truly a labour of love.
And I come back and there’s an email from Jan Elfline, my
colleague with whom I created the coaching programme, those many years
ago. And Jan is going to be doing a four
day Master Class, and she has spent days and days, if not weeks creating a
brand new kind of manual for it. Which
is a very visual manual, because the Master Class is on Visual Coaching, so you
know, she was sending me the proofs and is just totally delighted with it. And it struck me again, here is a labour of
love and somebody just investing their time because they care.
And then, yesterday, I was having a conversation with Robert
Dilts, because he and I are very close now to being ready to launch our
programme that will be on the internet, which is the Fellowship Programme. And it struck me again, talking about a labour
of love, we’ve been doing this for, I think it is just about three years, a
mindboggling amount of time, and we’ve had a great time doing it, but again we’ve really invested a
disproportionate amount of time and energy into something that, well it matters
to us, so therefore we do it.
And all three of these instances, seem to me to be examples
of how if you do what you really love, if you do what you really care about, if
you put the time and effort in, it may seem initially quite mad, and certainly
to other people it can seem like, well ‘just what is going to be the return on
this?’ But frankly the return is the satisfaction of the moment, the
satisfaction of seeing what you wanted to come into being. And that then, very frequently, engages
others because somehow or another, what matters to you is conveyed, and it
begins to matter to others.
So I think it is a big mistake to question whether or not to
follow your dreams, it’s actually more to the point to be able to realise
them. That may be in the form of a building,
such as this beautiful hotel rescued from a pile of rubble. Or it may be in creating something new which
really interests you. And that’s
absolutely been the case with Jan. She
has been so taken with the notion of the visual being a component which really
hasn’t had that much of a look in, in coaching, and yet, of course she comes
from a visual background, having lectured in the visual arts, but it’s also
that if you look at the tools that are most wide spread, and have come out of
coaching, the Balance Wheel has to be one of them, and again, what is
that? That’s a visual tool. And then with Robert and myself, what we’re
really focusing on is, well, how can that fuller life, which is one that drives
what we do anyway, namely a sense of being in service to something bigger than
oneself, and honouring that, by delivering practical ‘how tos’ so that first
ourselves can learn and then those who choose to engage with us, can learn the
tools and techniques for bring a more, I think, spiritual dimension to life
lived with purpose. You know, that
matters a lot. Well, it matters a lot to
us anyway. And so, I’m left with the
question, you know, what would it be like if everybody was engaging with their
own dreams, and grounding them so that something tangible issued forth, which
then everybody can benefit from and engage with. So, that’s the question that I’m left with,
and I’ll leave it with you.
‘Till the
next time.
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Ian McDermotts Understanding of Legacy
You know, it’s very striking to me how ideas have their
time. And it would seem that what I was
talking about when I referred to your daily legacy and influence you have being
your primary legacy, it would seem that that resonated with a lot of
people. It’s funny, because I can
remember, ooh it must have been nearly fifteen years ago now, talking to a
group of businessmen about the whole notion of legacy. And I remember there being a kind of
stupefied silence - they had not really the faintest idea what I was talking
about. Now, it may be because I just
wasn’t able to speak in an intelligible fashion about it, but you know, I don’t
really think it was that. I think it was
more that it, it was just outside their comprehension. And so times have moved on and people, I
think, have a different sense of possibilities of what matters, in a way that,
for me, is enormously encouraging, because it makes new things possible.
Listen to an audio version of this blog...
So, to pick up some thread as it were by popular request,
let me say a few more things about my understanding of legacy and what that can
mean for each of us. And so, the first
thing of course is, as I was saying, you know, it’s not about after you’re
dead. You have an impact now, you have a
daily influence and it’ll be for good or ill one way or the other, but it would
be impossible for you to not to have an influence, because you’re encountering
other people. Even if you were to go
through the world saying absolutely nothing, you’d still be someone in their
awareness and possibly that would be a contribution or actually not - who can
say? But the thing about thinking of
what you do as rippling out, as being you’re
impact on the world, is that you begin to realise that there’s more to you than
you may have thought.
I’ve often had the experience of clients I’ve worked with making reference
back to something I’ve said many moons ago, and telling me that that’s a remark
that really stayed with them. Now
there’s an example of influence and of legacy, because potentially, some of
those things have enormous impact on the way people decide to go forward in
their lives. So it matters a lot, and it
can be a simple thing.
I mean I remember one time, working with somebody and saying
to them, because they told me that they really couldn’t make any changes,
because they just wouldn’t feel like they were being themselves. And I said to them, you know, ‘How you are
used to being, is not necessarily who you are.’
And that was something that just caused a pause. And you could see that it was just settling,
and they thought about it for some while after.
So there are some words that actually gave them new options, and that
was me creating a legacy, in them. And
here’s another aspect, we don’t just create a legacy on a daily basis with
others, we do it with ourselves. If you
spend your time, on a daily basis, bitching about other people, trying to
deceive them, undermine them, get one up on them, whatever, you know, over time
that becomes a habit. Then that’s how
you get to be you. That’s creating a legacy
for yourself. Well I’d rather not. But on the other hand, if you do things that
consistently take you in a particular direction, over time there’s a different
kind of legacy. And that’s a gift you
make to yourself. So, there are many
kinds, it’s not just with other people, it’s also with yourself.
Let me give you a really simple, mundane thing. Suppose you were to floss on a daily basis,
that is one of the things you can do that will have a measurable impact on your
health, over time. It’s just a really
good thing to do. It for instance,
influences your heart health in ways that are in ways quite profound. So what you’re doing is engaging in an
activity, a practice which then has an impact on you, and you reap the benefits
of it. You’re literally creating your
own legacy by what you do and the way you do it. So you might want to choose some good habits,
and then reap the benefits down the road.
‘Till the next time.
Wednesday, 8 August 2012
'What NLP means to me' - Ian McDermott
From time to time Ian McDermott is asked to provide a preface to the books of colleagues. Ian comments: "Often I find that doing this gives me an opportunity to reflect and speak quite personally and in a different way. This is particularly true in this case."
This is Ian's preface to The Sourcebook of Magic (2nd edition) by Michael Hall published 2004 by Anglo-American Books.
I can still remember how the change I wanted in my love life came about… While I was enjoying considerable professional success I didn’t feel particularly happy or fulfilled in my relationship. I was on an NLP training and reached a threshold: I became aware that I really needed to change some of my own personal history – or at any rate the meaning I had made of it. I needed to do this if I was going to be able to allow myself to have the loving kind of relationship I wanted.
Synthesising a number of NLP techniques I spent several hours with myself. I was ready and primed and that was the perfect time. Did it work? Perhaps the best way I can answer that is that within 24 hours a new woman whom I had never met before came into my life. And not just a new woman but a different kind of woman. She was entirely different to those I had known before. Generous in spirit, not so self-preoccupied and much more available. In fact it seemed quite magical.
So did we marry and live happily ever after? Actually no. For while what happened inside of me to make this possible was an extraordinary experience, it was not the end of the story. I had more to do. And that took time. Even with NLP, it took time. But this was the turning point and that relationship represented the next stage in my personal journey. From then on things only got better until eventually I did meet the woman I married - and am still married to.
Right now you are holding in your hands the tools that can help make such change possible. In this masterly and comprehensive survey of what NLP has to offer Michael Hall has made it easy to understand when to use what. Even so learning how to use these processes is best accomplished experientially. Because the learning is in the doing, if you want to get good at NLP I would strongly suggest you take an NLP training. (Choose an organisation that has a proven track record and trainers you can trust).
NLP is frequently referred to as a technology and – in part – it is. Those science fiction dystopias that depict a world where technology has got out of control remind us that while technology can make a very good servant, it makes a very bad master. The same could be said of any advanced technology – including NLP. You get to be in charge of this particular technology by being clear about what you want to achieve with it and then engaging with your experience. With its many examples this book will show what is possible.
The technology itself is rigorous, evidence-based and can be calibrated to each individual. However, if you were to ask me what is the most advanced and important application of this advanced technology I would have no hesitation in my answer. I would say that it offers the means to enhance and nourish that least attended to and most important relationship in anyone’s life – your relationship with yourself.
So often NLP is presented as offering invaluable interpersonal communication tools. And it’s true. In addition NLP practitioners have modelled human excellence in a wide variety of fields. In fact NLP can be useful to anyone who is interested in answering the question ‘just how do you do that?’ of any human activity. However, in the final analysis I believe the power of NLP derives not from how it can help us become more influential with others or even model excellence. The real power of NLP is that it can enable us to become more influential with ourselves. Over time, if we choose to cultivate this relationship with ourselves, and consistently use the many NLP tools described in this book we may even move beyond excellence to some smidgen of wisdom.
And then there’s the world of work. As a consultant I frequently find the methodologies, the techniques, but also just the way of thinking that characterises NLP, to be liberating and productive in organisations - and not just for managers. My strategic and systemic work with leaders is made much easier by being able to call on a variety of NLP models and interventions. Every business I work with wants to know how better to manage crucial relationships and maximise client satisfaction. NLP has specific tools to help achieve these goals. What organisation wouldn’t benefit from those within it knowing how to put themselves in others’ shoes, be they colleagues or clients? What employee wouldn’t want to know how to better manage upwards? Again, NLP has specific techniques that make these learnable skills.
Recently I have become aware that I am now seeing an increasing number of coaches coming to take our NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner trainings. When I’ve asked them why their answers are remarkably consistent; because of its precision and techniques NLP means they can be more effective in the limited time frame of the typical 30 minute coaching call. Their other reason is very market driven. With so many people now calling themselves coaches, NLP enables them to deliver more effective results more consistently and so improve word of mouth referral rates.
This makes a lot of sense to me because NLP offers us the tools for understanding how we do what we do and what works - and also what is not working. Its range of applications will be limited only by the variety of people who get involved. In my office at home I have a special bookshelf reserved for the complimentary copies my students send me of the books they have written applying NLP to their own fields of expertise. These range from business, to athletics, to medicine, to headship, to equestrian excellence.
However, at its best it does so much more: it makes possible a practical compassion that enables us to effect profound structural change. At its best it is inclusive recognising that there may well be many ways of achieving a successful outcome. But it is also rigorous in delineating how some ways are much, much easier than others. Again at its best it is respectful and realistic because it acknowledges that we each have our own map of the world. It stresses we need to have that map honoured if we are to be available to new opportunities that take us beyond the boundaries of our previous thinking. I also value NLP because, at it’s best, it is demystificatory and democratic – using NLP you will find your experience has a structure. This means you can make sense of what you’ve been doing and change it if you wish.
For myself I work in the field because I have a vision of what is possible using these tools, this way of thinking - and what they ultimately can give rise to, which is a way of being. Potentially NLP is not just life changing but world changing. Sometimes it can even be the difference between life and death.
I have been inspired by my work with doctors and seeing just what is possible with the many NLP health applications that have been developed. I have felt humbled when one of my students, a barrister, tells me that he found his NLP skills meant he was able to counsel a senior Caribbean political figure who then commuted death sentences on a number of political insurrectionists. I feel new hope when another of my students starts using NLP in the restorative justice programmes he has pioneered with the police in the UK. Here crime victims and perpetrators come face to face and achieve resolution. The success of his work – as measured by a staggering drop in recidivism - sets me thinking, what if NLP was to be used in international mediation work? So I feel called to contribute when my Islamic students ask me to help them make NLP available in the Middle East. For me these and many other similar examples make the magic of NLP pale into insignificance when compared to the magic that people can do with it.
However, the best way to start changing the world is by putting your own house in order. Starting with oneself is a very good place to begin applying NLP if you want to come across as credible and congruent – and if you want to be successful over any length of time. NLP makes it possible to become aware of at least some of the presuppositions that are running our thinking and our behaviour – and hence our lives. It’s useful to know what yours are. It’s also nice to know that - as I can attest from personal experience - you can use NLP to change them if they’re not working for you.
So going back to my own romantic experience does this mean…‘I owe it all to NLP’? Er, no! Do we ever really owe everything to just one factor? If I was going to say I owe it all to anything it would be to taking charge of my inner life and changing what I believed possible. But what I would say is that, from my own experience, I can assure you that you can have the changes you want if you just start to build a better relationship with yourself and get clear about what you really want. And NLP is one very good way of doing this.
From such remedial beginnings are generative possibilities born. Often we can barely imagine what these might be. In my own case it meant finding there was something beyond what I had known. When I met Paulette, who later became my wife, I was challenged in myself to love differently and more deeply. That process I wouldn’t call magical. It is more mysterious still. It is alchemical and it changes you in a different way again. (But that’s another book).
Recently I received a letter from one of my students who had just completed our Practitioner and Master Practitioner training. In it she detailed the specific major new steps she was able to take after each module of these two programmes. These are the most profound changes to her life that she has ever experienced. Now 10 months later she has a new career, a new home, an apartment to let and is emotionally ready to share her life with someone. But her final line said more than all of this: “I’m so happy to be living life to the full now instead of just existing.”
I believe that, in the right hands, NLP has much to offer those who want to live life to the full and go beyond just existing. That’s why I think you owe it to yourself to read on. In this valuable contribution to the field Michael Hall has woven together the different strands of NLP and expertly delineated much of what NLP has to offer. I think you will find him enormously informative and trustworthy. I do. That’s why it’s a pleasure to welcome the second edition of this authoritative guide to the magic of NLP.
Ian McDermott
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Tuesday, 7 August 2012
Your Daily Legacy
Well I’m just back from Denver, Colorado, where I’ve been
speaking at what is clearly going to become an annual conference, and it’s run
by The Purposeful Planning Institute.
It’s actually a very lovely, rendezvous they call it, where advisors to
high net worth families meet to discuss
ways in which they can better serve their clients and move in the direction of
more purposeful lives. So as you can
imagine that gets my vote. And actually,
it started, the first rendezvous was last year, and in the run up to that, a
year before that even, I was asked if I would come on the steering
committee. Well those of you who know me
well, will know that a committee animal I am not really. But in this particular case it seemed such an
important initiative rather than just having advisors talk about tax plans and
so forth, that I actually really did want to be involved and I was, helped make
the first conference happen, and indeed spoke last year in Denver at the
conference. The result being that people
were really very moved, because I was working with somebody and did a
demonstration, and that’s something that these kind of people don’t see very
often, if at all.
So this year I was back and my theme was ‘how will you
change the world?’ and talking about legacy.
Well a lot of people think that legacy, oh yes, that’s what dead people
leave isn’t it? and you need lots of money to do it. And what I was saying was that nothing could
be further from the truth. Really, each
of us leaves a legacy, and it’s to do with the influence and the actions that
we engage in. the influence we have with
others, for good or ill, we have on a daily basis. You don’t have to wait until you’re dead good
lord! You can influence people moment by
moment and there are so many examples of this all around us, indeed very often,
I was telling them that when I’m working with clients, I’ll frequently give
negative examples of influence, because then people can immediately appreciate
how powerful influence is.
Recently in the US a guy called Jerry Sandusky was indicted
for multiple counts of child molestation and sexual abuse. And he was a coach on a very prestigious
football team. The guy doesn’t have much
money, but had the amazing ability to wreck a lot of people’s lives. Now, that’s a legacy, it just happens to be
profoundly negative. And once people
recognise that, gosh, yeah, I probably impacting people, it means that however
much money you have is almost irrelevant.
You will be having an effect on people, for good or ill. So the question then becomes, what sort of
influence do you want to have? And that
there’s no point in just saying oh little old me, what can I do? You know, if I was a billionaire I would make
the world a better place, well that’s nice, but actually you’re doing things
right now, the question is are they what you would choose? Is the influence you’re having the one you
would want to be associated with?
So my basic suggestion to people was we create our legacy on
a daily basis, and you cannot not leave a legacy on a daily basis. I wonder, what will yours be today? What was yours yesterday? The last weekend? Now, we’re not used to thinking like that,
but when we do one of the things that happens is people realise that they had
much more power and impact than they thought.
And this is true regardless of their income or their net worth. ‘Cause it ain’t about money. It’s about you. And this year was a very lovely year, because
I actually did a demonstration with the creator of The Purposeful Planning
Institute and in the process, he was making connections with why he has the
baggage he has, and how those had been with him pretty much all his life
really, and it just strengthens people and their resolve and their clarity
about what really matters and what do I want to be doing going forward in my
life?
So a very, very fulfilling weekend and I’ll tell you more
next time.
Listen to an audio version of this blog...
Saturday, 28 July 2012
NLP and Neuroscience
Well I’m mindful that two months have passed since the last audioboo, and it’s been an extraordinarily full time, a curious mixture really, but good to be back on track now. Of course, that period initially, with the death of my mother, and everything that goes with the death of a parent, and then moving into a whole raft of new developments, which I think will be just bearing a lot of fruit for a lot of people actually, and the one perhaps to begin by flagging would be the final coming together of NLP and neuroscience, which has been a dream of mine for longer than I care to remember to be honest.
It’s one of these curious things, you know, there’s been research taking place of neuroscience for certainly thirty years and it’s as if much of the work has stayed in the lab. Which is funny if you happen to be a researcher.
But there really is a practical dimension to understanding the way a brain works and therefore to neuroscience, because, hey, we’ve all got one and it could be kind of useful to have a more profound understanding of just what’s going on. And there are many examples, I think, of how more recent research could be extraordinarily beneficial if it was out there, if it was known about. So, for some years now, I have actually been actively looking for somebody who had the kind of background and credibility with whom I could partner to effectively begin the process of enabling both disciplines to come together. Because there seems to me, a lot of what NLP has done over the past thirty years is almost like applied neuroscience, without any science, you know, in the strict scientific sense of that word. If we’re talking about doing things that work, then NLP’s absolutely been right at the forefront delivering evidentially. However, I’ve been very interested in the conversations that I’ve been having more recently with Professor Patricia Riddell, who has been, herself, aware of what NLP has contributed to our understanding of practical technologies for change, and as a result of that we’ve been able to see how, you know, there really could be a way of integrating some of these elements, whilst allowing each to be its own province, its own field, of course, still.
And so, very recently, we actually did; well we do an open evening looking at habits, because there’s an area that is part and parcel of everybody’s experience. We have them or we like to acquire ones, you know, habits can be good, they can be bad. Or they could be things we would wish to have. But there is a structure to habits, which is how we come at it from an NLP point of view. And what’s going on in the brain is really fascinating, to enable one to understand how could you develop better habits, and how could you also become free of ones that are constraining.
So, we did this very brief opening really, which was received very well and we got very positive feedback about it. And in fact, come the NLP conference in November, we’re going to be doing something at somewhat greater length, focusing on exactly that area again, habits, and integrating what we understand from neurosciences, and what we now understand from the practicalities of habit change courtesy of NLP, and more recently, a couple of weeks ago, Trish and I did a one day event where we were starting to look at how could you take some of the basics of NLP and understand them through the filter of neuroscience. Well I have to say, it was an absolutely fascinating day. We were packed to the gummels, full house. And it was really very encouraging to see how there was benefits from both sides, and people were telling us that they had been looking for something like this… well no need to look anymore, there’s a lot more coming down the track. And we’re actually in process at the moment of, this summer, preparing new materials for new programmes. So I’ll keep you posted, but it’s good to be back, and there’s so much happening that you’re going to be hearing about very shortly.
So, ‘till the next time.
Listen to an audio version of this blog...
It’s one of these curious things, you know, there’s been research taking place of neuroscience for certainly thirty years and it’s as if much of the work has stayed in the lab. Which is funny if you happen to be a researcher.
But there really is a practical dimension to understanding the way a brain works and therefore to neuroscience, because, hey, we’ve all got one and it could be kind of useful to have a more profound understanding of just what’s going on. And there are many examples, I think, of how more recent research could be extraordinarily beneficial if it was out there, if it was known about. So, for some years now, I have actually been actively looking for somebody who had the kind of background and credibility with whom I could partner to effectively begin the process of enabling both disciplines to come together. Because there seems to me, a lot of what NLP has done over the past thirty years is almost like applied neuroscience, without any science, you know, in the strict scientific sense of that word. If we’re talking about doing things that work, then NLP’s absolutely been right at the forefront delivering evidentially. However, I’ve been very interested in the conversations that I’ve been having more recently with Professor Patricia Riddell, who has been, herself, aware of what NLP has contributed to our understanding of practical technologies for change, and as a result of that we’ve been able to see how, you know, there really could be a way of integrating some of these elements, whilst allowing each to be its own province, its own field, of course, still.
And so, very recently, we actually did; well we do an open evening looking at habits, because there’s an area that is part and parcel of everybody’s experience. We have them or we like to acquire ones, you know, habits can be good, they can be bad. Or they could be things we would wish to have. But there is a structure to habits, which is how we come at it from an NLP point of view. And what’s going on in the brain is really fascinating, to enable one to understand how could you develop better habits, and how could you also become free of ones that are constraining.
So, we did this very brief opening really, which was received very well and we got very positive feedback about it. And in fact, come the NLP conference in November, we’re going to be doing something at somewhat greater length, focusing on exactly that area again, habits, and integrating what we understand from neurosciences, and what we now understand from the practicalities of habit change courtesy of NLP, and more recently, a couple of weeks ago, Trish and I did a one day event where we were starting to look at how could you take some of the basics of NLP and understand them through the filter of neuroscience. Well I have to say, it was an absolutely fascinating day. We were packed to the gummels, full house. And it was really very encouraging to see how there was benefits from both sides, and people were telling us that they had been looking for something like this… well no need to look anymore, there’s a lot more coming down the track. And we’re actually in process at the moment of, this summer, preparing new materials for new programmes. So I’ll keep you posted, but it’s good to be back, and there’s so much happening that you’re going to be hearing about very shortly.
So, ‘till the next time.
Listen to an audio version of this blog...
Thursday, 26 July 2012
Writer's Alley
Well its summer in Connecticut, and it’s that time of year that’s always a great pleasure for me, because I get to do a lot of writing. I also get to, sort of, step back, take stock and think about future possibilities and opportunities. But it is especially a lovely part of the world to be thinking about the next chapter, the next book, and as there are three on the go at the moment, that certainly is something I need some space for.
And it’s a curious thing, but for reasons I will never know, I seem to be in a part of the world which has become like writer’s alley. And it struck me the other day, when originally we bought the house. We bought it from a very talented children’s author and illustrator, Stephen Kellogg, who has written many, many children’s books that are extremely well known in the states, and have a great following. And the way we engaged was just a delight, because we talked about this beautiful property that looks over the lake, and from our point of view we were really just stewards. Yes, the deeds would be in our name, but the most important thing was just to preserve it. Because at one point there was talk of turning it into a marina, which was not have been a great idea. So, anyway, here I am, writing away, and recently I learnt that down the road, literally eight doors away, is Suzanne Collins. Author of, yes indeed, The Hunger Games. And she’s in her writer’s, not exactly garret, but nevertheless her special building, which she’s just had constructed, and no doubt working on the next best seller.
So all in all, an interesting part of the world. And I remember, at one point, talking with Stephen about possible things that could be done, because when we bought the property here, nothing had been done to it for years, so that it was in need of a lot of care and attention. And the possibilities were great, but so were the potential costs. And he leant forward to me conspiratorially to me at one point, and he said “write faster, Ian, write faster.”
So, can’t stop, ‘till the next time.
Listen to an audio version of this blog...
And it’s a curious thing, but for reasons I will never know, I seem to be in a part of the world which has become like writer’s alley. And it struck me the other day, when originally we bought the house. We bought it from a very talented children’s author and illustrator, Stephen Kellogg, who has written many, many children’s books that are extremely well known in the states, and have a great following. And the way we engaged was just a delight, because we talked about this beautiful property that looks over the lake, and from our point of view we were really just stewards. Yes, the deeds would be in our name, but the most important thing was just to preserve it. Because at one point there was talk of turning it into a marina, which was not have been a great idea. So, anyway, here I am, writing away, and recently I learnt that down the road, literally eight doors away, is Suzanne Collins. Author of, yes indeed, The Hunger Games. And she’s in her writer’s, not exactly garret, but nevertheless her special building, which she’s just had constructed, and no doubt working on the next best seller.
So all in all, an interesting part of the world. And I remember, at one point, talking with Stephen about possible things that could be done, because when we bought the property here, nothing had been done to it for years, so that it was in need of a lot of care and attention. And the possibilities were great, but so were the potential costs. And he leant forward to me conspiratorially to me at one point, and he said “write faster, Ian, write faster.”
So, can’t stop, ‘till the next time.
Listen to an audio version of this blog...
Monday, 23 July 2012
From Inner Game to Neuroscience
Earlier this year, the association for coaching asked me if I would be up for doing a workshop at a conference in Edinburgh, the title of which was From Inner Game to Neuroscience.
Now unfortunately, I was running trainings on the days in question, so it just didn’t arise and I therefore said I would love to but on this occasion I can’t. But I did congratulate them on the title of the conference, because it was a way of summing up the journey that has really characterised coaching over the past, say, decade or more; from that Inner Game model, which is absolutely relevant, to more the talk of what the neurosciences can contribute to our understanding now. I actually think there’s a danger of assuming that one is somehow surpassing the other, and nothing could be further from the truth.
Because, in fact, of course, all that neuroscience does is help us have a more profound understanding of our consciousness, which is the essence of the Inner Game anyway.
And I think, part of what is now so potentially rewarding in terms of the work that is being done, and certainly that I’ve been aware of and involved in with colleagues, is that we’re actually able to begin a synthesizing of the Inner Game approach, which is essentially based on paying attention to oneself, turning the attention from being outer-directed and taking an in the world out there, to being more self-reflexive, that is to say turning attention back on oneself, and paying more attention to, well, ‘just how do I do what I do?’ ‘Just what is going on?’ ‘How do I, on occasion, get in my own way, trip myself up?’ and ‘How do I move into an easy flow state?’ And one of the things which I think that neuroscience is being to help us understand is, not only what’s going on in your brain that makes the best times such experiences of flow states, but also, what can we do to stack the cards in our favour.
You know, there are certain ways of engaging with ourselves, which will help more than others, and certainly some of the work that I’ve been recently involved in doing with Patricia Riddell, who is a professor of applied neuroscience, is coming to an understanding in new ways of how certain processes actually relate to what goes on in our brain.
And I’ll give you an example, that I found absolutely fascinating, which is, upper section of time. Now, you know, time is something which is kind of fundamental, and being able to differentiate between what happened yesterday and what happened twenty years ago is sort of useful. And the question sometimes arises, well how do we do that? And indeed, do we get into a muddle sometimes about the order in which something occurred and how does the brain do that?
Well it’s an interesting phenomenon, certainly that NLP’s been exploring for years, and I think devising very helpful techniques in so doing. You’ll see them in timeline work, for instance and Practitioner training.
The understanding that has arisen is that the way the brain codes time has a lot to do with how it organises things spatially. And so you have this fundamental distinction between looking at time going forward and putting the past behind you.
Notice how these are descriptions of place, spatial organising. The forward, looking forward, past behind you. And actually, what we know from neuroscience is that people are not that good at gaging spatial differences when they look directly ahead. But they are much better at gaging differences when they’re able to look from left to right. And what we find is in timelines, people that organise their timelines from left to right are very good at determining what goes where and finding a place for everything and having everything in its place.
And people that tend to organise time in a linear fashion, going out from right where they are in front of them , day by day and into the future, they have a much tougher time organising themselves sometimes. And we can actually learn more about what works and how to do it better. We can teach these skills and what we’re doing is coming to an understanding of ‘what do I do inside and what does my brain do? And hey, how about us getting together and doing this better?’
Until the next time……..
Listen to an audio version of this blog...
Now unfortunately, I was running trainings on the days in question, so it just didn’t arise and I therefore said I would love to but on this occasion I can’t. But I did congratulate them on the title of the conference, because it was a way of summing up the journey that has really characterised coaching over the past, say, decade or more; from that Inner Game model, which is absolutely relevant, to more the talk of what the neurosciences can contribute to our understanding now. I actually think there’s a danger of assuming that one is somehow surpassing the other, and nothing could be further from the truth.
Because, in fact, of course, all that neuroscience does is help us have a more profound understanding of our consciousness, which is the essence of the Inner Game anyway.
And I think, part of what is now so potentially rewarding in terms of the work that is being done, and certainly that I’ve been aware of and involved in with colleagues, is that we’re actually able to begin a synthesizing of the Inner Game approach, which is essentially based on paying attention to oneself, turning the attention from being outer-directed and taking an in the world out there, to being more self-reflexive, that is to say turning attention back on oneself, and paying more attention to, well, ‘just how do I do what I do?’ ‘Just what is going on?’ ‘How do I, on occasion, get in my own way, trip myself up?’ and ‘How do I move into an easy flow state?’ And one of the things which I think that neuroscience is being to help us understand is, not only what’s going on in your brain that makes the best times such experiences of flow states, but also, what can we do to stack the cards in our favour.
You know, there are certain ways of engaging with ourselves, which will help more than others, and certainly some of the work that I’ve been recently involved in doing with Patricia Riddell, who is a professor of applied neuroscience, is coming to an understanding in new ways of how certain processes actually relate to what goes on in our brain.
And I’ll give you an example, that I found absolutely fascinating, which is, upper section of time. Now, you know, time is something which is kind of fundamental, and being able to differentiate between what happened yesterday and what happened twenty years ago is sort of useful. And the question sometimes arises, well how do we do that? And indeed, do we get into a muddle sometimes about the order in which something occurred and how does the brain do that?
Well it’s an interesting phenomenon, certainly that NLP’s been exploring for years, and I think devising very helpful techniques in so doing. You’ll see them in timeline work, for instance and Practitioner training.
The understanding that has arisen is that the way the brain codes time has a lot to do with how it organises things spatially. And so you have this fundamental distinction between looking at time going forward and putting the past behind you.
Notice how these are descriptions of place, spatial organising. The forward, looking forward, past behind you. And actually, what we know from neuroscience is that people are not that good at gaging spatial differences when they look directly ahead. But they are much better at gaging differences when they’re able to look from left to right. And what we find is in timelines, people that organise their timelines from left to right are very good at determining what goes where and finding a place for everything and having everything in its place.
And people that tend to organise time in a linear fashion, going out from right where they are in front of them , day by day and into the future, they have a much tougher time organising themselves sometimes. And we can actually learn more about what works and how to do it better. We can teach these skills and what we’re doing is coming to an understanding of ‘what do I do inside and what does my brain do? And hey, how about us getting together and doing this better?’
Until the next time……..
Listen to an audio version of this blog...
Thursday, 19 July 2012
Wednesday, 18 July 2012
Exciting news!
We are delighted to announce that ITS have a brand new training venue.
From September 1st 2012 all ITS programmes will be held within The Academy situated at The London Kensington Forum.
The Academy offers excellent facilities and is located in the European flagship Holiday Inn Hotel which is to be found in South Kensington.
The Holiday Inn London Kensington Forum has recently gone through a £6.5 million refurbishment as part of the global relaunch of the Holiday Inn brand. Amongst other things this has meant new beds and carpets in all 900 bedrooms. Then six months ago the hotel had a further £4 million investment as they built a brand new Gym, Business Lounge, Executive Boardroom and of course The Academy.
We recently held our sell-out one day NLP & Neuroscience workshop within The Academy and can confidently say you'll enjoy both the training rooms and the coffee lounge. We hope you will agree with us that it's a great learning environment.
To find out more click here.
The ITS Team
We are delighted to announce that ITS have a brand new training venue.
From September 1st 2012 all ITS programmes will be held within The Academy situated at The London Kensington Forum.
The Academy offers excellent facilities and is located in the European flagship Holiday Inn Hotel which is to be found in South Kensington.
The Holiday Inn London Kensington Forum has recently gone through a £6.5 million refurbishment as part of the global relaunch of the Holiday Inn brand. Amongst other things this has meant new beds and carpets in all 900 bedrooms. Then six months ago the hotel had a further £4 million investment as they built a brand new Gym, Business Lounge, Executive Boardroom and of course The Academy.
We recently held our sell-out one day NLP & Neuroscience workshop within The Academy and can confidently say you'll enjoy both the training rooms and the coffee lounge. We hope you will agree with us that it's a great learning environment.
To find out more click here.
The ITS Team
Monday, 21 May 2012
Ten Essential Strategies For
Turning Vision into Action
By Ian McDermott
Many of us have a vision, how do we make that vision come alive? Here, Ian McDermott, Master Trainer and NLP Coach will tell us more ...
Start Being Who You Really Are
Those rare individuals, who create lives which are the picture of their dreams and visions, are at home in themselves. At the times when you are turning your vision into action, you will be ‘being you.’ So by contrast, it can be really useful to look at the times when you are not ‘being you’ to be clear about how you are selling yourself short. You can then use the tools of NLP and the skills of Coaching to make any changes in the areas that will make the journey from Vision into Action; easier, faster and more rewarding.2. Decide How Much Your Vision Matters
Turning your vision into action should not be a struggle. There may be obstacles to overcome. Those who achieve are driven by a strong desire to take action. The strength of this desire is directly related to how much your vision matters to you. If your vision does not matter deeply to you, is it any surprise to find yourself un-motivated to take the action? If taking action is a problem for you, you may want to go back and check the vision. Maybe it requires fine tuning. Perhaps it's time for a new vision. Either way, a vision that matters deeply to you is a pre-requisite for significant action.3. Face Your Fears
It’s useful to distinguish between ‘fear’ and the natural concerns and hesitations that we all experience when doing anything new and significant. If you take off in an aeroplane on a windy day, you may have some moments of ‘doubt’ but you probably just buckle your seat belt, take a deep breath and get on with it!There are also times when you know deep down that fear is an important message. In particular, appreciating the positive intention of the fear and using NLP can rapidly reduce or eliminate it all together. In fact, when fear is the major obstacle stopping us turning vision into action, it’s time to get excited, because once you deal with the fear; you open the door to your potential.
4. Check - What Are You Voting For In Your Life?
With every minute, we choose to do one thing rather than another. Every moment we do this we are voting with our time.On any given day we have a finite amount of energy. We can spend it wisely – or not.
5. Check – Will You Collaborate With Others?
Many people are anxious when it comes to working with others; that they’ll be done down or undermined in some way. Others are not sure how to find allies. Whatever your vision, it is almost certainly the case that at some point you’re going to need to be collaborating with others.6. Get The Right Balance Between Vision & Action
We’ve all met individuals who live in the land of amazing ideas. They spend most of their time fantasising over their visions. The problem is their visions are just that – fantasies – because they lack an effective strategy to take action. The opposite extreme is the individual who is so busy ‘doing’ that they never step back to consider what they are doing – and most importantly why they are doing it. Such people certainly get a lot done, but often not the things that will lead them to fulfilment.So the key is to find a balance between vision and action.
7. Make A Phased Transition
Beware the motivational speaker who tells you to ‘just go for it’ and throw away the day job. You need to build time into your planning for turning vision into action – enough time to manage any major transition and enough time to ensure that if you meet unexpected setbacks you will not be thrown off course.8. Decide - Are You Willing To Pay The Price?
The gold medal winning Olympic athlete is often cited as a metaphorical example of what you need to do to turn vision into action. They visualise success, they set goals they are passionate about what they do, they are able to enter ‘the zone’ etc etc.True enough. But there is another factor in the athlete’s success which is not mentioned as frequently, because it is not quite as appealing. They are willing to pay the price. They are willing to get up at 5am every day and practice in freezing temperatures. They will endure frustration, failure and sometimes physical injury.
Hopefully turning your vision into action will not be quite as arduous. But if you are going to accomplish anything of significance, there will probably be a price to pay. It may be small or large but part of achieving that goal involves deciding that you are willing to pay the price.
9. Learn How To Tap The Wisdom Within
Many people wonder whether they can turn their vision into action without realising that they have vital resources to do so already within them. These resources are available once you know how to tap the wisdom of your unconscious mind.Developing this ability to tap into your own inner wisdom will lead you to make better decisions.
10. Know What You Want Your Legacy To Be
Those who achieve are invariably driven by a vision that encompasses some larger or even higher purpose. Often, they will talk of what they want to leave behind, of ‘creating something more than me’ or ‘creating something that will live on after me.’ Your vision will be easier to achieve when you know what you want your legacy to be. When you turn your attention to what your legacy will be, you are taking an important step in turning your vision into action, because you are creating an incredibly strong reason for your behaviour.Wednesday, 29 February 2012
Real Leadership By Ian McDermott
If you were to ask the average man or woman in the street what makes a good leader, the majority, I think, would put forward qualities such as strength, determination, courage and, for many, ruthlessness. If you were to ask how many people demonstrate such qualities, our fictitious survey group might cite Napoleon, Churchill, Margaret Thatcher and some leaders of industry such as Richard Branson. Leadership is perceived as being in short supply.
However, in fact, we are all leaders some of the time - and not just in special
circumstances. A parent needs to lead his or her children. A partner within a
relationship will, if the relationship is to be balanced and work, have times of being the leader and other times of being led. Even though leadership may not be a full time occupation, we will all have moments when others look to us for direction, guidance and support.
My experience as a trainer, a mentor, a consultant and a coach has made me very aware that each involves a different leadership role at times. Becoming clear about my own style of leadership has been very important for me both personally and professionally.
Leadership, I have found, is like charity - it begins at home. To be a good leader of others you first need to know how to lead yourself - and when you can lead yourself, you can lead others.
I think you need to be clear about the journey you wish to make, the speed at which you wish to travel and the beliefs and values that will guide your path. In the training courses that I run, we call this process pacing yourself. In other words, being true to yourself and not trying to force yourself to be anything that deep down you know isn’t really you. It is about becoming the leader that is already within you.
So often when I’m coaching executives my function is to draw out what they have not recognised that they have within themselves. In the context of training, this means allowing the leader to come out as opposed to teaching slick tricks or having to stick ‘leadership’ on from the outside (much as you might stick wall cladding on a house to cover up cracks). Leadership, when you are true to yourself, flows like a river and is without effort. It emanates and radiates – and it has strong attractor properties.
Put another way, leadership is about personal congruence. And the key to personal congruence is being able to pace yourself. To pace yourself you need to be able to honour and acknowledge the different aspects of yourself whether your conscious mind likes them or not. You will also need to address your own particular habitual patterns and experiences. If this sounds like a tall order, the good news is that the ways to achieve this can all be taught.
In addressing these areas I have found myself personally changing and becoming more aligned. It is like the different parts of me are all going in the same direction. The pay-off is enormous as you are truly able to walk your talk, to practice what you preach and to do what you say. It produces a particular kind of leadership style - leading by example. This is about leading by being: being one whose behaviour is naturally aligned with who you are and what matters to you. My experience is that once people know they can have this, they want it very badly because it is profoundly healing and very empowering.
Leading in this way whether at work or in your personal life means acting with
personal purpose stemming from a centred sense of self. It is centred because it steers a safe course between grandiose self-promotion and punitive self-criticism. Too often people oscillate violently between these two extremes.
This really is empowering and it’s good news for others. Leaders who are empowered have as a high priority the empowerment of those they lead. Expect such people to be: (i) clearer about what matters to them and more able to be themselves; (ii) not just confident but truly competent; (iii) creative because they are able to adapt.
Once you can pace yourself you are ready to lead yourself and others. The more competent the person becomes, the less they need to dominate, whether as a trainer, a parent, a consultant, a manager, a coach or indeed a human being!
My research suggests that the most effective leaders are motivated by a vision that is allied to their mission. Their mission is an expression of who they are and as a result it is not just a bunch of words, it manifests from within and is an expression of that individual’s identity.
Unfortunately, many find themselves in businesses and organisations, in positions where they are expected to demonstrate a leadership style which is not really them, a cultural ‘norm’ that just doesn’t fit. Over time this can eat away inside you, and at your success, like a corrosive acid. As one executive I was coaching said, “On the outside I’ve got it all, but inside I just feel hollow.”
To enhance someone’s ability to be a leader in their life, one must first enhance the individual who will be that leader. There is no better way to do this than to draw out of an individual his or her own unique vision and mission. Why? Because these are born of that person’s identity. This is Leadership Coaching.
I have found that to identify one’s mission in life is a very profound experience. It matters a lot to people and stays with them afterwards. This is because they have achieved a high degree of integration and as a senior executive said to me this morning by way of finishing our coaching session, ‘Now I know what my purpose is.’
It also has two remarkable and often unexpected side effects. People begin to become more successful. They also become more creative.
***
So being a leader is not about commanding vast armies of people, nor is it about having power over others. People who seek power over others are usually chronically disempowered individuals themselves. Nor is leadership about control: the better you are as a leader the more you are able to influence. The more influential you are, the less you need to try to control.
Once your sense of self and your mission are aligned with what you do, you become unstoppable. How could you not do your mission if your mission is a natural expression of who you are? In the words of another coaching client, ‘Now I can enjoy doing me’. From my own experience in aligning my behaviour with my mission I can vouch for the truth in this.
The Difference That Makes a Difference
ITS is at the forefront in applying the latest research in the neurosciences to better business practice.
A primary resource for over 100 of the world’s top companies and organisations, ITS also offers individuals the opportunity to apply what we now know to improve their own performance.
ITS specialises in growing leaders.
However, in fact, we are all leaders some of the time - and not just in special
circumstances. A parent needs to lead his or her children. A partner within a
relationship will, if the relationship is to be balanced and work, have times of being the leader and other times of being led. Even though leadership may not be a full time occupation, we will all have moments when others look to us for direction, guidance and support.
My experience as a trainer, a mentor, a consultant and a coach has made me very aware that each involves a different leadership role at times. Becoming clear about my own style of leadership has been very important for me both personally and professionally.
Leadership, I have found, is like charity - it begins at home. To be a good leader of others you first need to know how to lead yourself - and when you can lead yourself, you can lead others.
I think you need to be clear about the journey you wish to make, the speed at which you wish to travel and the beliefs and values that will guide your path. In the training courses that I run, we call this process pacing yourself. In other words, being true to yourself and not trying to force yourself to be anything that deep down you know isn’t really you. It is about becoming the leader that is already within you.
So often when I’m coaching executives my function is to draw out what they have not recognised that they have within themselves. In the context of training, this means allowing the leader to come out as opposed to teaching slick tricks or having to stick ‘leadership’ on from the outside (much as you might stick wall cladding on a house to cover up cracks). Leadership, when you are true to yourself, flows like a river and is without effort. It emanates and radiates – and it has strong attractor properties.
Put another way, leadership is about personal congruence. And the key to personal congruence is being able to pace yourself. To pace yourself you need to be able to honour and acknowledge the different aspects of yourself whether your conscious mind likes them or not. You will also need to address your own particular habitual patterns and experiences. If this sounds like a tall order, the good news is that the ways to achieve this can all be taught.
In addressing these areas I have found myself personally changing and becoming more aligned. It is like the different parts of me are all going in the same direction. The pay-off is enormous as you are truly able to walk your talk, to practice what you preach and to do what you say. It produces a particular kind of leadership style - leading by example. This is about leading by being: being one whose behaviour is naturally aligned with who you are and what matters to you. My experience is that once people know they can have this, they want it very badly because it is profoundly healing and very empowering.
Leading in this way whether at work or in your personal life means acting with
personal purpose stemming from a centred sense of self. It is centred because it steers a safe course between grandiose self-promotion and punitive self-criticism. Too often people oscillate violently between these two extremes.
This really is empowering and it’s good news for others. Leaders who are empowered have as a high priority the empowerment of those they lead. Expect such people to be: (i) clearer about what matters to them and more able to be themselves; (ii) not just confident but truly competent; (iii) creative because they are able to adapt.
Once you can pace yourself you are ready to lead yourself and others. The more competent the person becomes, the less they need to dominate, whether as a trainer, a parent, a consultant, a manager, a coach or indeed a human being!
My research suggests that the most effective leaders are motivated by a vision that is allied to their mission. Their mission is an expression of who they are and as a result it is not just a bunch of words, it manifests from within and is an expression of that individual’s identity.
Unfortunately, many find themselves in businesses and organisations, in positions where they are expected to demonstrate a leadership style which is not really them, a cultural ‘norm’ that just doesn’t fit. Over time this can eat away inside you, and at your success, like a corrosive acid. As one executive I was coaching said, “On the outside I’ve got it all, but inside I just feel hollow.”
To enhance someone’s ability to be a leader in their life, one must first enhance the individual who will be that leader. There is no better way to do this than to draw out of an individual his or her own unique vision and mission. Why? Because these are born of that person’s identity. This is Leadership Coaching.
I have found that to identify one’s mission in life is a very profound experience. It matters a lot to people and stays with them afterwards. This is because they have achieved a high degree of integration and as a senior executive said to me this morning by way of finishing our coaching session, ‘Now I know what my purpose is.’
It also has two remarkable and often unexpected side effects. People begin to become more successful. They also become more creative.
***
So being a leader is not about commanding vast armies of people, nor is it about having power over others. People who seek power over others are usually chronically disempowered individuals themselves. Nor is leadership about control: the better you are as a leader the more you are able to influence. The more influential you are, the less you need to try to control.
Once your sense of self and your mission are aligned with what you do, you become unstoppable. How could you not do your mission if your mission is a natural expression of who you are? In the words of another coaching client, ‘Now I can enjoy doing me’. From my own experience in aligning my behaviour with my mission I can vouch for the truth in this.
The Difference That Makes a Difference
ITS is at the forefront in applying the latest research in the neurosciences to better business practice.
A primary resource for over 100 of the world’s top companies and organisations, ITS also offers individuals the opportunity to apply what we now know to improve their own performance.
ITS specialises in growing leaders.
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